Three weeks? Who in the world was silly enough to bet she'll stay THAT long?
My new Emily just joined the firm today, after an exhaustive search by HR. Admittedly, this is their second attempt in as many months to successfully staff the NuttyDepartment with much needed help.
Note the words "attempt" and "successfully". *snigger*
This time round, I decided to help HR along and chose to forego my usual requirement that candidates have at least a cursory exposure to legal mumbo-jumbo. Thought that might make it a mite easier for the lovely boys and girls in HR to find suitable candidates. Whose sole purpose in life would be to send my faxes. Scan stuff. Fetch my coffee. Or lunch, if I’m ever so inclined. Walk the dog if I had one. Check the brakes on my car. You know. Emily stuff.
I must admit that I am, so far, quite unimpressed with the one they sent my way.
For one, EmilyOne didn’t pre-interview her. *gulp*
She also looks for all the world like she came from the civil service. *double gulp*
And she failed the six-word test. Miserably. Gave me a blank stare when I said “facade”. *sigh*
Over lunch, I had this little conversation with the managing partner at the NuttyFirm:
HY : So how’s your new Emily?
Me : Not promising, if I’m to be entirely honest.
HY : Why’s that?
Me : She has “civil service” written all over her face. And she’s already applied for leave. On her first day. Nuff said, really.
HY : *rolls eyes*
Me : *rolls eyes*
HY : So how long you reckon she’ll stay?
Me : Two weeks. Max.
HY : Really? I was thinking more like next week! Ha ha!
Me : *snigger*
And here I thought I was the pessimistic one!
Rather unsurprisingly, the entire department now is betting on New Emily’s staying power. Two weeks, max, seems to be the current favourite at the exit polls. I've got a fifty riding on it.
Here’s hoping I’m right. *guffaw*
Note the words "attempt" and "successfully". *snigger*
This time round, I decided to help HR along and chose to forego my usual requirement that candidates have at least a cursory exposure to legal mumbo-jumbo. Thought that might make it a mite easier for the lovely boys and girls in HR to find suitable candidates. Whose sole purpose in life would be to send my faxes. Scan stuff. Fetch my coffee. Or lunch, if I’m ever so inclined. Walk the dog if I had one. Check the brakes on my car. You know. Emily stuff.
I must admit that I am, so far, quite unimpressed with the one they sent my way.
For one, EmilyOne didn’t pre-interview her. *gulp*
She also looks for all the world like she came from the civil service. *double gulp*
And she failed the six-word test. Miserably. Gave me a blank stare when I said “facade”. *sigh*
Over lunch, I had this little conversation with the managing partner at the NuttyFirm:
HY : So how’s your new Emily?
Me : Not promising, if I’m to be entirely honest.
HY : Why’s that?
Me : She has “civil service” written all over her face. And she’s already applied for leave. On her first day. Nuff said, really.
HY : *rolls eyes*
Me : *rolls eyes*
HY : So how long you reckon she’ll stay?
Me : Two weeks. Max.
HY : Really? I was thinking more like next week! Ha ha!
Me : *snigger*
And here I thought I was the pessimistic one!
Rather unsurprisingly, the entire department now is betting on New Emily’s staying power. Two weeks, max, seems to be the current favourite at the exit polls. I've got a fifty riding on it.
Here’s hoping I’m right. *guffaw*
41 comments:
LOL! So this new Emily brings you coffee? Will she get the order right?!?! :D
How much is everyone betting? :D
A fifty? That's all you're betting, luv? I expected more. Far more :P
So how many Emilys do you have now, Nut? :P
Can I bet too? :D haha!
It was all I had in my wallet at the time, old man :P Don't judge!
Pinkstripes - Four. For now. Can't say it'll remain that way two weeks from now....hur hur :P
Another girl???
Why don't you find a guy to be your PA, Nut???? :D
Cute, intelligent, hardworking, male assistants are impossibly hard to come by, Ben! SOOOO much harder than girls! :P
Is Emmett still around?
Search Grindr for one lah! :P
Yes he is, CC - though he's under a different dept now. hur hur :P
Anon. You could not possibly have a worse database to start the search with :P hur hur
Grindr??? LOL!!!! :P
Put an ad here on the blog!
You might find someone! ;)
Have you tried using an agency, luv?
Just specify "cute gay applicants only" on the description ;)
Scruff? LOL :P
Good idea, CC. I'll just ask them to administer the 6-word test while they're vetting the applications :P hur hur
Facade is No# what on the test?
It's No.2 on the list Anon.
Does this mean she passed the first word? :P haha!
HR certainly has an odd sense of humour.....lol!
So what kind of winnings are we talking about here, Nut?
She's applied for leave on her first day at work!
I think there's almost 300 in the pool right now...hur hur ;)
Yes. She did. Unbelievable. But true. Sigh....
How much is the pay for an Emmett like, we wonder?
You have someone for Nut, Janvier? :D
Depends on his PQE, generally, Janvier. Anything between twice to three times my Starbucks budget, usually. :D
Oh Ben we could just look up Grindr while we're in Chelas for a laugh :P
PQE???
Two to three times your Starbucks budget? *purses lips
Why would you be in Chelas in the first place, Janvier?
What is your Starbucks budget?
Work or play, Nut. But for your sake we can headhunt, too. :P
Of course, be plepared to expect the worse in your 6-word test.
Go. Headhunt in the name of your Queen! hur hur :P
Just for God's sake, make sure he gets past No.3 on the 6-word test at the very least before lobbing him onto a cart back to Buckingham.
Plepared? lol!
Somehow we think evely one of 'em will tell us that the fa-cha-dey is vely nice. Btw what is a fa-cha-dey ah?
Perhaps you can overlook this flaw if he keeps mum and has a nice, um, facade? :P
If he recites my coffee order correctly three times, you have a deal :P
What's lobbing?
wow..... apply for leave on the first day???
Please tell me you laughed at her...
Make her weep! Quick!
it's so hard to find good help these days.
UPDATE : Unsurprisingly, new Emily has gone on MC today. Sigh....:P
LOL. Is she back at work today? Haha
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